Blindsided: A Mother’s Appeal

Please, choose carefully the words you speak. My child trusts you and needs care, not criticism. As the world tears at him, he expects to be uplifted by you—not trampled under condemning remarks veiled in sarcasm. Maybe you think you’re funny. Perhaps you’re intimidated, fearful of investing in him. You seem more comfortable with those like you. Shunning and shaming those who aren’t.

Avoidance may be your way. So, please, be mindful of your body language. How clearly it communicates with up-turned nose and brow. Handshakes and hugs are withheld as you claim love, joy and peace. Yet, you frown, fret and reject those who don’t fit your perfect, pious picture as you imagine your children do.

Beware of those who seem a snug fit. Your gushing doesn’t go unnoticed. Remember, he sees his peers in their true light—with masks off, guards down. And you play the fool charmed by their facades.  Those you praise are often in disguise, not as honest as those you snub.

“Judgment looms under every steeple. Lofty glances from lofty people. They can’t see past the scarlet letter…”* or attitude, or tattoos, or piercings. Have you forgotten that which will devour your soul with a slow, stinking rot if you are not vigilant?

Please remember, he’s your fellow traveler. He struggles to walk a narrow path with boundary lines ever-blurring. Have your own battles, cloaked in shifty justifications, become so subtle—they appear trivial, even nonexistent? Please don’t plead ignorance. Arrogance will do. Our enemy’s ancient habit, his downfall, is still a useful tool.

You, who tout Christ’s name, speak words of encouragement. Empower my child with firm truth motivated by love. He needs what you claim to have. Don’t you know he aches to be free from bondage? Accusations harass him before he enters your alleged safe haven. The one that bears your Savior’s name.

Outside, temptations promise hope in futility. A day will come when he won’t return if, within you, he finds the same. And you will blame the world for doing what it only knows to do. It will ravage a soul sacrificed on the alter of legalism, wounded by your sharpened tongue. Oppression reigns out there. But that’s where he expects it. By you, he is blindsided.

I count on you to be Christ to my child. Challenge him but love him. He needs acceptance and unconditional love. Is he much different than you?

“When [Jesus] saw the crowds, he had compassion on them because they were harassed and helpless like sheep without a shepherd.” –Matthew 9:36

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Friends, This was penned years ago by one angry mom. We, Christ followers, have the privilege to reflect Him to the hurting, stressed and confused. Legalism robs us and those we’re called to love. God’s law is good but without love its useless, toxic. The Pharisees of Bible times were enslaved to the strict adherence of the law. Jesus called them “white-washed tombs.” Let’s not squander Christ’s gift of freedom. May we continue to seek God’s immeasurable grace, allowing it to flow through us. Let’s kick legalism back into the pit from which it slithered.

 

*From “Does Anybody Hear Her?” by Casting Crowns.